Guiding Children Successfully Educational Guides
Program 12. Enjoying Life with Children

By responding promptly and sensitively to children, they will become less
demanding over time.
1. Make way for play
Do you ever find yourself denying your child precious moments of play?
How might you better manage your time (or thinking) so that you can play
with your child when he or she is in the mood?
2. Make a place for stories.
Think about how your child responds to being read to. What are your best
moments? How can this activity be incorporated more into your relationship
with your child?
3. Make time for talk.
Do you ever find yourself too tired to talk?
Think about the last time you tried to talk to your child in order to get
him to “open up.” What kind of questions did you ask? How might your
communication be improved? Can you answer these love map questions for each
of your children?
- What is my child's favorite breakfast food?
- What kind of movies does my child like to see?
- What is my child's biggest hobby?
- Who is my child's best friend?
- What are my child's favorite activities?
Think about the people in your life. How can you apply John Gottman's
love map to those people?
4. Be there in tough times.
Much like adults, children have bad days. Think about the last time your
child came home upset or angry. Is there a better way you can deal with
those situations when they arise?
5. Stay in touch
Think about how your child responds to your touch. Try to keep in mind
that children have moments when they don't want to be touched. But, there
are also times when they do to be hugged or cuddled. Do you notice and
respond when they want to be held?
It is important to remember that the most important contracts we make are
the ones we make with our family. How can you provide them the best of
yourself?
For additional information, see web units at
www.arfamilies.org. Of
particular relevance to this program are:
Showing Love by Taking Time;
Family Reading;
Celebrating as Families
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