 Health & Nutrition
Thoughts on
Aging
Anticipatory Grief: When you know someone is going to die, but you don't know when
(2 minutes: 55 seconds)
 MP3 (audio
only)
Audio/Video Script:
Dr. LaVona Traywick
Assistant Professor - Gerontology
[Announcer] Welcome to Thoughts on Aging with Dr. LaVona Traywick,
Assistant Professor of Gerontology with the University of Arkansas Division of
Agriculture Cooperative Extension Service.
[Dr. LaVona Traywick] Upon learning that your mother has Alzheimer's disease, or that you have
terminal cancer, you may find yourself feeling hollow over a loss that has not
yet occurred. The anxiety and dread you feel is a normal reaction to the
anticipation of loss. What you are feeling is called anticipatory grief.
Anticipatory grief is the normal mourning that occurs when you or someone you
care about is expecting to die. Depending upon the illness, such grief could
last for months up to many years; the slow decline can be a heavy burden.
A whirl of emotions surround anticipatory grief because you know and come to
expect that a person you care about is going to die, but you do not know when,
nor do have control over when, the death will actually take place. In addition
people also suffer with thoughts and anxiety about what they will feel like when
the person they care about is gone. Such suspense is agonizing - it torments you
and overwhelms your thoughts. Anticipatory grief has many of the same symptoms
of those experienced after a death has occurred.
In order to heal and move forward, it is very important to face anticipatory
grief. Healing will involve a process that takes self-honesty and soul
searching. One way to face your grief is by allowing yourself to cry. Tears
can be an emotional release. Tears can also help bring people together as crying
often evolves into sharing your story with others, and they with you. Keeping a
journal to track your thoughts and feelings is another way to face your grief.
Journaling helps you to identify what you feel and may make it easier to tell
someone about your experience. If you do not have a friend with whom you can
talk, there are church leaders, health care workers, counselors, and support
groups who will lend a caring ear.
Anticipatory grief symptoms are a big deal. Taking charge of your symptoms
today, will help you be prepared for the road to come.
[Announcer] Thank you for listening to Thoughts on Aging with Dr. LaVona
Traywick. To learn more about this and other topics, contact your local county
Cooperative
Extension Service office.
Resource:
Hodgson, H. (2005). Anticipatory grief symptoms: What's the big deal?
Retrieved
http://www.americanhospice.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=80&Itemid=13
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