Dollars & Cents for Youth
Lesson 6 - Study Course For Parents
Main Ideas
• Key Words
• Money Talk
• Questions That Might Concern You
• Guidelines For Parents
• How Are You Doing? Rate Yourself
Main Ideas
- When families work together, they can better solve their questions and problems.
- Family discussions provide many learning experiences for children.
- Children learn to share through activities with other people.
Key Words
Family Council - A time for all family members to get together to talk
about matters that affect them. It is a good time for parents to share with
their children and teach them skills needed for a happy, successful life.
Money Talk
Families can do many things that will help them grow together. One way
parents can teach money management to children is by a family council meeting.
This is a time when all family members get together and talk about their needs
and wants and what they can afford to do as individuals and as members of the
family. It is an excellent opportunity for children to see themselves as
"partners" in the family business of managing the income available.
The main benefit of a family council plan is to help your child understand
that spending is governed by income and your individual family's
situation and needs and not by what someone else spends.
When the family council is implemented on a regular basis with open, honest
discussions, both parents and children come to understand one another better.
The child does not need to know exactly what you make and what you owe. You,
as a parent, will be able to sense when it is necessary to communicate some
details and when some details are beyond the child's comprehension.
Questions That Might Concern You
Q. What if a child loses money?
A. Sympathize with a child in the loss of money. Let him/her
know you understand and share his/her feelings and discuss the loss in a calm
way. Find out how the child happened to lose the money. Did it accidentally slip
out of his/her pocket or did he/she fail to put it in a safe place? Suggest ways
to prevent future losses and encourage the child to carry only as much money as
is needed. Replace that part of the lost money needed for essentials.
Q. What if a child hoards money?
A. Some children may hoard their money and refuse to
spend it. This is probably a passing phase - a normal situation in the
process of learning to use money - and should not needlessly worry parents.
If children hoard all their money, they may be getting the things they want
by persuading parents to buy them. Sometimes young people have difficulty making
choices and end up buying nothing. Or they may be secretly saving for some
long-wanted item. Parents may help by discussing possible ways to use money,
guiding children in making choices, and encouraging young people to spend
their own money for some of the things they want.
Q. What if a child fails to spend money for necessities?
A. Children sometimes fail to use money for necessities as
they agreed to. For example, children might spend lunch money for
entertainment or some other item. First, make sure they understand what items
they are responsible for from their allowance or spending money. Check also to
see that this money is adequate to cover expenses as well as some personal
choices. If children continue to use their money for purposes other than
planned, you may want to supervise their spending more closely for awhile and
reduce the number of choices they make.
Q. What if child goes on spending sprees?
A. Children may save money like misers for weeks and then
suddenly spend it all on something you think is worthless. Seven- or
eight-year-olds may use their entire allowance impulsively in one day, even
though they have carefully set up a plan for spending.
Q. Should a child be given more money or should the child
be made to suffer the consequences of the spending sprees.
A. When a child is out of money and may miss an event that
has experience value, it may be wise to give him/her extra money. Then help
him/her review and plan expenditures again. On the other hand, a child of 11
or 12 who has had several years of practice with an allowance, it may benefit
them to face the results of their actions. At this point parents should
discuss the situation with them calmly and, if they are missing some cherished
activity, help them find a substitute for the activity they are missing.
Disappointment is a reality of living, and it is important to learn how to
recover from it.
Q. What if a child breaks something in the house?
A. Should a child be made to pay for such damages out of
his/her spending money? That depends on the situation and the child. What
was the cause? Was it an accident or was it carelessness? Was it deliberate?
It also depends on the amount of the allowance and the cost of the damage.
If the allowance is small, a child may have to forfeit all of it and thus
have no money for daily needs. Parents would have to hand out money for
these. But in paying for part of the damage, a child may gain an
understanding of the value of property.
Q. What if a child breaks a neighbor's window or damages other property?
If a neighbor's window is broken as the result of a
backyard game, someone has to pay for the damage at once. If the cost is
moderate, it may be wise to let the child apologize and have the experience
of arranging for its repair. If the cost is too great for the child's
allowance to cover, adults may have to help out. For the sake of family
solidarity, it is a rewarding experience to stand shoulder to shoulder with
children. When you help pay damages, you can explain that the money comes
from family funds and may affect family spending. Children appreciate adult
assistance in a crisis. It helps them to understand how their actions affect
family spending.
Q. What if a child steals money?
A. Adults are often shocked if they discover that a child
has taken money from them or from someone or some place. This does not mean
the child is a thief or is likely to become one, and the child should not be
treated as a criminal. Children's stealing, in most cases, is a passing
phase, and when it does occur adults should first try to understand why it
happened. Handle children's stealing calmly and privately but promptly.
The preschooler may need help in learning what does and doesn't belong to
him/her. Children older than 6 or 8 who are aware that they have done
something wrong can be given a chance to "save face" by returning
what they have taken. If the money has been spent, give the child the
opportunity to make amends by paying it back from his/her allowance. The
fact that a child steals money repeatedly and gives it to others or spends
it to treat them may indicate that he/she is lonesome or unhappy and needs
more affection and understanding. Help the child make closer friendships
both at home and with others of the same age.
Guidelines For Parents
Remember that no two families are alike. No hard-and-fast
rules can be provided to help you teach your children money management. You can
use the following suggestions as guidelines as you and your family manage your
money.
- Be a good manager of money yourself. Remember that
the kind of financial responsibility which children find in their own
home will naturally exert a powerful influence on their attitude toward
the use of money.
- Give a child a regular fixed allowance as soon as
he/she is old enough to understand the use of money and teach him/her
that the allowance takes the place of asking for money.
- Let the child in on the family financial picture.
Children should be given a general understanding of the family's
income - its principal source and its main expenditures. If these
discussions are kept cheerful, free, and matter-of-fact, the topic of
family spending need not be too great a responsibility on your
shoulders.
- Give the child opportunities to get experience in
managing money.
- Let the child make mistakes and learn by experience
that denial must follow extravagance or misuse of money. Allow the child
to see that buying a cheap product is often expensive in the long run.
- Encourage the child to earn extra money if he/she
wants to increase his/her income by giving him/her a real job to do,
preferably one that has commercial value and by paying no more and no
less than it's worth. Be sure that any work the child does outside the
home to earn extra money is not physically harmful and does not expose
him/her to harmful influences. Help your child find ways to earn money.
- Never use money as a reward or punishment. Teach the
child that there are certain duties that should be performed as a member
of the family group and even as a community citizen without pay.
- Teach the child the value of saving for a definite
purpose instead of saving for the mere fact of saving, let him/her also
learn the folly of spending all his/her money at once and going into
debt to buy something.
- Teach your child that borrowing money costs extra and
must be repaid. Show your child that by going without something now,
greater satisfaction may be gained later. Explain that caring for things
that cost money is as important as saving money itself.
- Help the child to realize the importance of wise
sharing in addition to wise spending and saving. Don't overemphasize
the value of sharing money. Show your child that satisfaction and
happiness may be had without money through service to others.
- Encourage your child to keep track of money spent.
Introduce him/her to banking, either by having the child open a personal
account or by helping you with the family account.
When you train your child in sound financial habits, you
will equip him/her to solve many of the difficult problems of adult life.
Additional information available from your
county Extension office
How Are You Doing? Rate Yourself.
. .
Use the following questions to check your progress in helping your child manage money.
|
YES |
NO |
| Does my child have some money to manage without my
interfering? |
|
|
| Have I helped my child set up a plan for spending? |
|
|
| Have I explained why and how one saves for future goals? |
|
|
| Do I avoid using money as a reward or punishment? |
|
|
| Does my child share household chores as part of his/her
responsibility as a family member? |
|
|
| Do I set a good example in being truthful about money
matters? |
|
|
| Have I increased my child's financial responsibilities
as he/she has matured and gained experience in handling money? |
|
|
| Does the child participate in family financial planning so
that he/she sees the relationship between individual income and that of
the family? |
|
|
| Am I a competent manager and do I set a good example for
children to relate to? |
|
|
Yes" answers indicate that you make efforts to help your
children gain money management skills. "No" answers suggest that you
may need to better prepare your children for their role as money managers.
Now compare your answers here to those you listed at the
beginning of this course. Do you feel better equipped to teach your child about
money management? Let us know your feelings about the course, "Dollars
& Cents for Youth."
This material was originally prepared by Joyce H. Jenkins, Extension Family
Resource Management Specialist, and Naomi H. Willis, Extension Instructor of
Home Economics, and is being used with permission of Clemson University
Cooperative Extension Service. Recommended to Arkansas by Wanda W. Shelby,
District Extension Family Resource Management Specialist, University of Arkansas
Cooperative Extension Service.
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